Jerry Wise Relationship Systems/Adult Children of Narcissists.
Jerry Wise, MA, MS, CLC is a relationship expert. Dr. Jerry works with clients all over the world to find an authentic self in spite of past abuse, trauma, and dysfunctional or toxic families.
Contact Jerry Wise for one-on-one help at firstname.lastname@example.org or 317-919-6264 (USA).
He helps clients online.
How many of you reading this grew up with narcissistic parents? Do you even understand that your parents are narcissists?
We are Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents.
I hope you watch many more of his helpful talks. (I’ll remind you at the end).
Six Core Issues For Adult Children Of Narcissistic Parents.
- Self-power shedding.
- Leaving the present (dissociation).
- Feeling isolated even in a crowd.
- Unresolved inter-generational trauma.
- Negative grandiose fantasy.
Jerry Wise Relationship Systems | Here is Jerry’s discussion of the six core issues for ACONs:
Here are a few traits from the six core issues:
- We give power away. Give others more power than ourselves. Over-own our low sense of self. We experience ourselves as nothing, everyone and everything else’s feelings, wants and needs, trumps ours. All we know is being ground into the ground as children, we have an inner deep core of shame which we shed onto others. Emotional power? Yes we give that away to others as well. We engage in our feeling process over our thinking process.
- We suffer mild detachment to more severe detachment. Detachment from reality, we suffer more memory loss, and have a sense of disconnection from one’s self.
- Typically we have few to no peaceful or stable relationships. We have a fear of relationships and feel overwhelmed just being with other people. With us the whole world is built on conditional love or conditional acceptance.
- Then there is shame shedding, This creates PTSD. Our emotional system is not felt but it is triggered. We live in a world of denial and believing we had loving parents. We are hyper vigilant when interacting with others and we carry internalized abuse, shame, and criticism.
- I’m so special because I’m not special at all. We feel over responsible for others’ failings and faults; everybody is always watching me. No one would want to be my friend. We blame ourselves when things go bad, even the bad weather is our fault.
- Over-closeness. We lack emotional detachment and we lack separateness. We are too fused with the narcissist and the family of origin which lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation.
Take a few minutes, even hours, to watch Jerry explain why we choose toxic partners, toxic friends, etc.